What if God were On the Bus?

I always loved how Joan Osborne's lyrics captured the essence of it being possible that anyone could be anything, and what if God were just a "slob like one of us" ...just a "stranger on the bus...". I got that reminder today. I realized I'd misplaced my metro card and was frantically searching my pockets for the fare just as the bus pulled up.  Then in my frenzy a receipt I needed went flying into a puddle, and I plucked it out gingerly, flapping it dry.

Shaking my head at my own disorganization I heard a woman ask if I needed a tissue to dry off the receipt. I looked up and it was a shabby but warmly dressed woman, who was missing most of her teeth. Probably in her 60s, but could have been younger based on what seemed to have been a hard-lived life. I thanked her and declined then shared how stupid I felt about losing my metro card.  Without a second of hesitation she asked if I needed money for the fare.

A whole range of thoughts raced through my head -- from "oh gosh, I hope she didn't think I was looking for money," to "she doesn't look like she even HAS any money - let alone any she could spare?" to "what an incredible gesture." Clearly to all appearances I was the one who should be offering her help, but this stranger from the bus thought nothing of helping another stranger even if it put her that much more behind on rent, or food. I was humbled, and honored. I assured her that I would be okay, after she asked at least twice more if I was sure I'd be okay.

I thanked her and said I wished more people were like her. She just asked, "Well, that's just the way we should all treat each, isn't it?"

Simply, yes. It is.
And a stranger from the bus reminded me of that.

Predicting a Social Media Based Society

As a media marketer, I've been awed by the impact of social media on all our lives for a while now. In a Faith Popcorn moment recently I was trying to imagine the even greater impact it will have on society down-the-road. Will the transparency social networking forces on brands now drive us to be kinder, gentler human brands because of the power of mob to criticize? We already open ourselves up to criticism for every opinion posted. And we make instant heroes of the Steven Slaters of the world (212,000 Facebook fans and counting) who act out secret fantasies in public.

So, think about where will we be as the walls are continuously torn down... where that will put us in 20, 30 years under our belts of a medium that is only in its toddler-dom today?
What adjustments will we make?
Will the pendulum swing backwards to greater privacy than ever, as a backlash to too much crowd judgments on every move one makes?
Will it burst open even further and manners and mores be damned?
Will we become vanilla pudding, scared to make a move or take a stance?

I wonder.

Tamar Weinberg wrote a nice blog on balancing social media social lives and blending with relationships offline, applying practices of one on the other.

As social media enthusiasts, we often forget that we live in a different type of world than everyone else. We might be more keen to open up to strangers and share our feelings with people we don’t know. It’s the world we’re living in — for us, at least, and it will continue as we spread these ideas to our peers and colleagues, all of whom will likely slowly open up to this world in due time. All paths will ultimately lead to here whether or not these “outsiders” have chosen to accept it yet.

Faith Popcorn, criticized by some, lauded by others, predicts less conspicuous consumption (driven by fear of criticism again or is it the economy, stupid?...though we won't hesitate to rubberneck in awe of a Real Housewives' lifestyle and shop their bankruptcy sale). Either way, social media is part of the problem and the solution:

Amy Avitabile, senior vice president of marketing at Lord & Taylor, called the use of social networking a “complete game-changer.” Lord & Taylor is using Facebook and Twitter in nonpromotional ways. It also has a mobile strategy for messaging. While Lord & Taylor was late to the party with e-commerce (its site is less than two years old) “it’s the number-one trending door by a lot,” she said....

“Our big message was to alleviate the guilt of shopping,” said Avitabile. “We don’t sell things she needs, but what she wants.” So the store developed the “Shop Smart” campaign, created by David Lipman with the tag line “Shop More, Guilt Less.”

Popcorn also thinks supermarkets will work to compete with local farmer's markets' rise in popularity but may fail without "authenticity and transparency." Why? Again, because of social media, and our ability as consumers -- or just humans -- to point fingers and get to the truth.
Truth is the breath of life to human society. It is the food of the immortal spirit. Yet a single word of it may kill a man as suddenly as a drop of prussic acid.
~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Thoughts? Criticisms on this post? Please share, but leave the prussic acid at home.

Miss Manners is Rolling her Eyes

I don't always keep my elbows off the table. Sometimes I opt for the easy email reply vs. a handwritten thank you...or worse, forget to do either. I'm sure I can think of other manners-shortcomings -- just none I'm willing to cop to right here.

But I have never threatened to shove a tennis ball down someone's throat, or jumped on stage to steal the glory from someone making a gracious acceptance speech. And even some time since 4th grade, I've probably called someone a liar. But this was a bad week for high profile people forgetting their manners in a massive way.

We are on a slippery slope of letting some of our role models get away with murder -- or at the very least character assassination -- with some people applauding the temper and disrespect excused as "passion" of Joe Wilson, Serena Williams and Kanye West. Was it a full moon? It's really hard to keep cool under pressure, but these are people we've elected or elevated to celebrity status, or who are USED to major pressure (er, we're talking "World Champion" pressure.) I don't know how or what we'd censure, but I think just being aware of it, posting or tweeting about it, and not letting them off the hook with a shoulder shrug is a start. At least most of the comments about Kanye on CNN's Facebook page were more condeming. But where's the remorse? It takes a big person to make a big and sincere apology.

It's scary to lose it. We've all done it to a degree. Words you can't take back in an argument. Getting frustrated in traffic. Throwing the spaghetti against the wall. (Wait, I said I wasn't going to mention that.) Our personal Lizzie Grubman Moments. Times when better judgement is sadly obfuscated by the heat of the moment. And it can change everything -- like your whole life. There are TV shows based on those moments.

Maybe the trick is meditating? Maybe a little group therapy? I for one would pay to see Joe, Serena and Kanye in school with Miss Manners. Then again, maybe she should have a regular program in addition to her forum and columns. We could all use a refresher course in what shouldn't be tolerated before we all become social flunk outs.